Disclaimer: I have always supported the right of consenting adults to engage in the sorts of relationships with other consenting adults that fulfill them. The closest thing to hatred I’ve ever felt for anyone in the LGBT community is jealousy when one of them is prettier than me - yes, I’m looking at you, Blaire White.
Basically, I have never given a damn how adults conduct their sex lives, unless children are involved…
Cue the controversy.
Florida just passed CS/CS/HB 1557 a.k.a. the Parental Rights in Education bill a.k.a. the “Don’t Say Gay” bill. And, naturally, people are enraged.
There’s critics claiming the bill will “demonize” LGBT people.
There’s people claiming the bill would harm the community:
Finally, here’s the take that broke my heart:
I know that the members of Pearl Jam - most notably my beloved Eddie Vedder - have pretty much always been outspoken and upfront about their liberal stances. So, I’m not surprised that they “say gay.” I support their right to say gay. Hell, I support their right to be gay if they please.
But what I cannot support is abject stupidity. And their take on this “oppressive” bill is a display of such behavior.
See, the “Don’t Say Gay” label placed on the Parental Rights in Education bill is an impressive example of a strawman fallacy. If any of the critics read the bill in its entirety (it’s literally 7 pages of large font generously spaced, it’s not a damn car manual) and gave it a fair assessment, then they would know how absurd of a mischaracterization “Don’t Say Gay” is.
For starters, the legislation is expressly for schools in Florida. So, sorry Mark Hamill, your right to say “gay” is still intact and was never actually infringed upon to begin with. But, go ahead, and make yourself look silly anyway:
The majority of the bill discusses proper conduct between school staff, students, and parents. For example:
“The procedures must reinforce the fundamental right of parents to make decisions regarding the upbringing and control of their children by requiring school district personnel to encourage a student to discuss issues relating to his or her well-being with his or her parent or to facilitate discussion of the issue with the parent.”
This same sentiment is reiterated throughout: a parent’s right to be in the know about their children’s lives. In other words, it encourages parents to reclaim their children from the grasp of the state and provides them legal recourse to do so.
Tell me again - what’s so bad about that?
Some might say: well, there are children out there with shitty parents and can’t exactly have an open and honest relationship with them. You know what? I agree. I know that there are some kids out there who would rather not discuss issues with their parents. Perhaps they do not have as great a support system as other children, and may be placed in actual danger following the adherence of this legislation.
In fact, when I began reading the bill, that was my own first critique of it. But then I read this:
“This subparagraph does not prohibit a school district from adopting procedures that permit school personnel to withhold such information from a parent if a reasonably prudent person would believe that disclosure would result in abuse, abandonment, or neglect, as those terms are defined in s. 39.01.”
I mean, I’m not gonna go looking into whatever ‘s.39.01’ is, but it seems that there is already a safeguard in place for children with shitty parents.
So the question remains: my dear, once-adored Pearl Jam, what is so “oppressive” about this bill and why is Luke Skywalker defiantly saying “gay”?!
The answer is simple and can be found on pg. 4 of the text:
“Classroom instruction by school personnel or third parties on sexual orientation or gender identity may not occur in kindergarten through grade 3 or in a manner that is not age appropriate or developmentally appropriate for students in accordance with state standards.”
There you have it, folks. The most oppressive legislation ever written.
On a more serious note, can we just take a moment to understand what we’re dealing with here? We really have people out here heated about not diving into fucking sex and gender studies with goddamn 4 - 9 year olds, dog! Isn’t that fucking wild?!
To anyone who is protesting this, I gotta know: why do we want to talk to kindergartners about sex? How is that appropriate?
I’ll make you a deal here, Mr. Protester. Go to the mall. Find a child that you think is somewhere between 4 and 9 years old. Approach the parent and ask: hello, I was just wondering if I can have a discussion with your child regarding his/her sexual orientation and gender identity? It’ll only take a few minutes.
Ok, do that and try not to get slapped - or, worse, get Chris Hansen called on your ass.
It used to be shameful - hell, it used to be criminal - to sexualize children. Now we have political officials doing it publicly:
Look, I’ve heard many stories of gay people saying they “always knew they were gay” or “ever since a young age, they felt like they didn’t fit into the ‘norm.’” I understand that, yeah, some kids are going to grow up to be gay.
But is the proper response to this to prescribe classroom lectures to 4 - 9 year old children about sexuality? Can’t we just - I don’t know - focus on teaching them the alphabet, the number line, and how to tie their fucking shoes? Can’t we just make sure children can hold a goddamn pencil properly and write their names neatly without tracing the letters before we ask them who they are sexually attracted to? Is that unreasonable?
It seems pretty reasonable to me. And that’s why I’m heated that people are heated over this bill: in trying to push their own agenda, they’re ignoring the most vulnerable of society. Children need proper educators who respect the parent-child relationship - not these self-righteous, sexually-repressed, projecting groomer lunatics. Not like this pompous bimbo:
And, if you’re not convinced that bill CS/CS/HB 1557 is a response to an actual problem, here’s some supplemental material:
A special note for parents - if you found any of this concerning, please do something about it. Look into your child’s school and make sure everything is kosher, especially if your child spends more time at school than with you.
And if you don’t have children or don’t give a shit, consider this: the youngest generation and the one younger than it are going to be the the young adults to shape the world we will have to co-inhabit in our old age. Whether you care or not, the upcoming generations and their well-being effects all of us.